How to thrive in the midst of change

When you think of a change taking place in your life, which emotions come up for you? Positive or negative? Are you the type of person who hates change? Maybe you like the familiar and dread anything being different than it is now. Or maybe you love the idea of change. You can’t sit still for too long and feel a need to change things up often. It excites you and motivates you. Or maybe you fall somewhere in the middle like I do :). The definition of change itself is neutral but our life experiences often make us afraid of change. It can be scary or unknown, involving a risk. I once took a graduate course entirely on transition management. It was one of my favorite classes and while the focus was on leadership in business, a lot of the same concepts apply to everyday life. A change could be forced upon you (like losing a job) or initiated by you (like deciding to develop a healthy habit!). Often, the bigger the stakes the bigger the emotions. Mindset matters the most when going through any type of change or life transition whether you asked for it or not. It’s important to manage your stress and emotions. One way to do this is by working on your mindset. How you view the situation and react to it will often determine the outcome of the change. My clients come to me because they want to make a change in their life. And sometimes just because we want to make a change doesn’t mean that we will be successful at it. Intention doesn’t equal impact. You must take consistent action to have an impact. There are many factors both outside and inside of our control surrounding any change. When faced with a decision or difficult circumstance, our minds will gravitate toward the path of least resistance. Make sure your path is a healthy one by building resilience, developing healthy habits, continually working on your personal growth, focusing on your faith, and building community/support. When change does happen, you are better prepared for it. Even if the change is a very good and healthy thing (such as leaving a toxic relationship) there will still be a grieving process that goes along with it (maybe it’s grieving the future you thought you would have with this person, grieving the loss of hope that they will change, etc). You know the change will be a great thing in the long run, but your mind still wants what is comfortable. And to keep yourself from falling back into the very thing you are trying to escape, you need to have the necessary tools I have mentioned. A strong foundation for when the chaos comes. Try to focus on the hope, excitement, new possibilities that come with the change. Remember the discomfort is temporary and soon the “new normal” will settle in. Whether the change is big or small, it is one thing in life we can count on. Change is all around us and refusing to change anything or fighting against positive changes will only harm your potential and growth. Moving to a new city or home, going back to school, ending or starting a relationship, joining a new church, marriage and merging families, changing your diet or workout routine, changing your hairstyle. Think of all the change that has occurred over your life and all that is to come. You can prepare well for change without living in fear and anxiety. What changes are you in the middle of right now? Or do you anticipate in the near future? What has been your relationship with change in the past? How do you typically handle change? Make a list of why you are excited about the change, what you hope happens, and what you can control. - CS

Read more about stress management here. Stress from changes in our lives can affect us all so differently. It’s important to find what works best for you in keeping the impact of the stress to a minimum.